NOTHING TO SEE HERE

It’s Friday now and we’ve been waiting since Monday for some pictures and a bit of copy from Dayyan (our team rider) to drop this end of the blog but he’s fallen off the radar. We’ve been calling but only getting as far as a recorded message. Not responding to emails either.

His last blog from Chile mentioned “getting belted during epic sessions” and a mate driving their rented car into a power pole but no talk of disappearing further into the ‘wave kingdom’ with the Mambo Visa card in his pocket. I guess we’ll know where he’s been when the bills start to arrive. But wherever he is it’s got to be warmer than Manly. Nine degrees yesterday morning! We spent the first hour in the carpark huddled around a fire in a 44-gallon drum waiting for the coffee truck to arrive. You reading this Dayyan?! (bastard)

In a half-hearted effort to find something to stick on the blog we put out a memo asking for content but apart from an address to a Thai porn site and a recipe for 2-minute noodles, got nothing. On the second call we got next to nothing - a (book) review of Moby Dick by our accounts manager (name withheld at the request of our accounts manager).

“Accounts” has been reading the book, on-line (too cheap to rent the video), over the past eighteen months, during his lunch hour!? Finished it two weeks ago (so that’s what he was doing in that little office beside the handicap toilet).

Anyway, if you’ve got nothing better to do - and you’re only wasting your boss’ time, here it is.

MOBY DICK was written by Herman Melville in 1851, before television was invented. The story follows the adventures of a wandering sailor named, Ishmael and his voyage on the whaling ship, Pequod, commanded by a grizzled old Captain Ahab. Ishmael soon discovers that Ahab is only interested in hunting down one whale in particular, a ferocious and enigmatic white sperm whale called, Moby Dick. In a previous encounter the whale destroyed Ahab’s boat and bit off his leg. Ahab’s still pissed and intends to tear Dick a new one.

If you’ve ever wanted to grab a harpoon, run away to sea and spend twelve months chasing 27 ton of man-eating seafood in an unseaworthy boat with a psychotic captain and a bunch of sociopath crew mates whose only point of convergence is an indifference to sexual preference, then this is the book for you.

Don’t be intimidated by its size. Moby Dick weighs in at a meaty 700 pages, 1,012 if you can make it to the end of the commentary. It’s heavy enough to kill a Hong Kong sewer rat or at least stun the bugger until you can find a shovel and finish off the job. And if you decide half way through that you probably should have kicked off your reading with something a little less ambitious (with some pictures?) you can always use it to choc the back wheels of your Mazda while you’re working under the hood.

While I wouldn’t have said “no” to a couple of mermaids and some jelly wrestling, Moby Dick is a recommended read. I can guarantee you won’t want to put this book down, except maybe to give your arms a rest and to get the blood circulating again. MOBY DICK gets four and a half bookmarks from me.

Please note, Mambo will resume normal transmission next week

Tags: dayyan neve, mambo, moby dick